Dr. Jordan Sudberg on Creating a New Relationship with Your Chronic Illness

Living with chronic illness is more than managing symptoms—it’s an ongoing journey of adaptation, acceptance, and personal growth. For many patients, the experience can feel like a constant battle against an unpredictable adversary. Yet, pain management specialist Dr. Jordan Sudberg encourages a different perspective: developing a relationship with your chronic illness, rather than merely fighting it, can transform your experience and improve your quality of life.

In this post, Dr. Sudberg shares insights on what it means to create this relationship, why it matters, and practical strategies to foster understanding and resilience in the face of chronic illness.

Understanding the Concept: What Does It Mean to “Create a Relationship” with Chronic Illness?

When we hear “relationship,” we often think of connections with other people. But in this context, it means acknowledging your chronic illness as a part of your life—not something you simply endure or ignore, but something you understand and engage with.

Dr. Jordan Sudberg explains:

“Chronic illness is often unpredictable and relentless, but resisting or denying it can increase suffering. Creating a relationship means learning its patterns, triggers, and limits, and finding ways to coexist with it rather than be controlled by it.”

This shift in mindset can foster empowerment, reducing feelings of helplessness and improving emotional well-being.

Why Creating a Relationship with Your Illness Is Vital

For many patients, the emotional and psychological burden of chronic illness is as debilitating as the physical symptoms. Struggling against the illness can lead to frustration, burnout, and isolation. According to Dr. Sudberg, embracing the idea of relationship helps:

1. Promote Acceptance

Acceptance doesn’t mean giving up but recognizing reality and choosing how to respond.

2. Increase Self-Awareness

Understanding your symptoms and limits enables better management and decision-making.

3. Improve Communication with Healthcare Providers

When you comprehend your illness more deeply, you can describe symptoms and responses clearly.

4. Build Emotional Resilience

Acknowledging the illness as part of your life reduces fear and anxiety.

Steps to Build a Positive Relationship with Chronic Illness, According to Dr. Jordan Sudberg

Dr. Sudberg advocates a multi-faceted approach that blends practical strategies and emotional work.

1. Listen to Your Body

Your body communicates through symptoms, pain levels, and fatigue. Rather than pushing through, learn to “listen” and respond accordingly.

“Journaling symptoms, energy levels, and emotional states can help patients identify patterns and triggers,” Dr. Sudberg suggests.

2. Educate Yourself

Knowledge is power. Understanding the nature of your illness, its common symptoms, and treatment options helps demystify it.

“Patients who educate themselves tend to feel more in control and make informed decisions,” says Dr. Sudberg.

3. Set Boundaries and Prioritize Self-Care

Creating limits around activities and responsibilities is essential. This may mean saying no more often and focusing on rest and recovery.

4. Develop Mindfulness and Emotional Awareness

Practices like meditation, breathing exercises, and therapy can improve your relationship with chronic illness by reducing stress and enhancing acceptance.

“Mindfulness teaches patients to observe their experience without judgment, creating space between them and their symptoms,” Dr. Sudberg notes.

5. Build a Support Network

Connecting with others who understand your journey—whether family, friends, or support groups—can provide comfort and insight.

The Role of Pain Management in Strengthening This Relationship

Pain is often the most challenging aspect of chronic illness. Dr. Jordan Sudberg emphasizes that effective pain management is critical not just for physical relief but for emotional balance.

“When pain is managed, patients can focus on living rather than just surviving,” he explains.

Pain specialists work alongside patients to develop tailored plans that integrate medication, physical therapy, lifestyle adjustments, and psychological support. This holistic care encourages patients to engage with their illness constructively.

Real-Life Impact: Patient Transformations Through Relationship Building

Dr. Sudberg shares a story of a patient, Mark, diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. Initially overwhelmed and in denial, Mark struggled to accept the changes the illness brought.

“Through pain management and counseling, Mark began tracking his symptoms and practicing mindfulness,” says Dr. Sudberg. “He learned to anticipate flare-ups and adjust his activities accordingly.”

Today, Mark describes his relationship with his illness as a dialogue—a partnership that, while difficult, allows him to live a fulfilling life.

Common Challenges When Building This Relationship

The process isn’t easy. Patients often face:

• Grief and loss: Mourning previous levels of health and activity.
  
• Fear of uncertainty: Not knowing when symptoms will worsen.
  
• Social isolation: Feeling misunderstood by others.
  
• Frustration: At the slow pace of progress or treatment setbacks.
  

Dr. Sudberg encourages patients to be patient and compassionate with themselves:

“Building this relationship takes time and isn’t linear. There will be setbacks, but every step forward counts.”

Practical Tips to Get Started Today

If you’re ready to begin creating a relationship with your chronic illness, Dr. Jordan Sudberg recommends:

• Start a symptom and emotion journal. Track what you feel daily, including triggers and relief methods.
  
• Set one small self-care goal per week. This might be taking a short walk, practicing breathing exercises, or scheduling rest.
  
• Educate yourself about your condition. Use reputable sources or ask your healthcare team.
  
• Try mindfulness or relaxation techniques. Apps and online videos can be helpful starters.
  
• Reach out for support. Whether online or in-person, connection matters.
  

Final Thoughts: Transforming Your Chronic Illness Journey

Creating a relationship with your chronic illness is not about resignation—it’s about transformation. As Dr. Jordan Sudberg puts it:

“It’s a path to reclaiming your life on your terms, with greater understanding and peace.”

This mindset allows you to live fully despite challenges and opens the door to new possibilities for well-being.